congratulations! you're a cool girl

but you've lost your personality

she’s so cool girl aesthetic with her micro bangs, 20 rings on each hand, baggy jeans and a small tank top with her tiny boobs and smoking 5 cigarettes a day and somehow that counts as having a cool personality. sure whatever she says is funny even if her personality sucks and reeks of bought humour and someone else’s caption.

she doesn’t have any regard for anyone or care about anything but she’s already been decided as cool so anything she says is cool too

nonchalance is the highest form of coolness to exist nowadays.

i always looked up to “cool girls” or whatever i used to think cool meant when i was 14

but when ur 14 with a body you hate and mind you can’t stand to be in, you assume anything that would get you out of here seems magical and beautiful. Being considered “cool” meant i’d be accepted by everyone and well loved.

i did everything i could to be considered cool and accepted, safe to say it worked. I was finally considered “cool enough” but i genuinely lost a sense of who i was. I was blindly following whatever the next trend that seemed cool was. When you’re 14, you don’t question whether its actually what you want or if you’re just doing it because everyone else is doing it. You just do it to escape that fact that you’re you because you wanna change everything about yourself.

as you grow up, you lose sight of yourself. Yes, very cliche but it’s true. everything seems like a performance for an audience you don’t even like. There’s guides on what to like, what to wear, what to listen to, where to eat if you wanna be a cool girl. there’s videos on how you can dress like a cool girl.

from one search on insta, tiktok & pinterest

being a cool girl is an internet search away.

and that’s why its stops feeling real and more like a performance.

i can’t help but think of this quote by Bell Hooks, “If any female feels she needs anything beyond herself to validate her existence, she is already giving away her power to be self-defining.”

the version of “cool” you keep chasing is a performance for people who don’t like you. We’ve stopped being real, we’ve stopped liking things just because we like them. We want labels to tell us which category we fit in. Are you a cool girl or a chic girl? Are you a clean girl or not? you just wanna be more appealing, more interesting so you keep buying things that the internet tells you are cool. Everything about being cool is polished and curated to get attention and validation.

you’re depriving yourself of actual value and personality by borrowing personality.

being cool isn’t organic anymore. It’s all about fitting in now, losing your authenticity and seeking validation. You’re forcing yourself to like things you don’t even like because you wanna be considered cool. You don’t even know who you are because you keep hiding behind things other people told you they like. well, coolness isn’t something that can be taught or bought or even learned from these so called guides on the internet.

coolness comes from within. When you wear something you like despite people calling it “ugh that’s not your colour”, that’s cool. When you stop forcing yourself to hold the same values as a certain group because you wanna fit in, that’s cool. When you actually hold yourself accountable for the shit you’ve done wrong, you’re cool. When you cry because you care about smth you pretended not to care about, you’re cool. when you take up space and stop catering to standards set up by patriarchy, you’re cool. When you’re authentic to yourself, you’re cool.

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thank you for reading!! you’re cool ⭐️